THE SEX FILES: A Trio Of Fun

Here’s three wacky slightly sexy stories for all of us who want to take a break and maybe have a little laugh. It can’t be all interviews and DVD reviews and vibrator guides here at THE SEX FILES. Sometimes I just want to coax a little smile from you if I can…

Sinead wants some

In a blog entry titled, “IS SINEAD ABOUT TO HUMP HER TRUCK?” Irish songstress Sinead O’Connor bemoans her lack of intimacy of late.

“My sh-uation sexually/affectionately speaking is so dire that inanimate objects are starting to look good as are inappropriate and/or unavailable men and/or inappropriate and/or unavailable fruits and vegetables. I tell you yams are looking like the winners,” she says, adding:

“Needless to say what I do for a living makes it hard for me to find men that only want me cuz they like my (legendary) arse. Yet I am in the peak of my sexual prime and way too lovely to be living like a nun. and it’s VERY depressing.”

I have no idea if Sinead’s ass “compares” but she does seem to like it played with, as she admits later:

“Let me now take time to make VERY clear that yes I ‘do anal’ and in fact I would be deeply unhappy if ‘doing anal’ wasn’t on the menu, amongst everything else. So if u don’t like ‘the difficult brown’.. Don’t apply…”

Are We Not Men?

Why bestiality is not already illegal in Florida is anybody’s guess but a new law was passed recently in the sunshine state to prohibit “knowing sexual conduct or contact with an animal.”

This is what it says…

An act relating to sexual activities involving animals; creating s. 828.126, F.S.; providing definitions; prohibiting knowing sexual conduct or sexual contact with an animal; prohibiting specified related activities; providing penalties; providing that the act does not apply to certain husbandry, conformation judging, and veterinary practices; providing an effective date.

The problem is of course…we’re all animals. We better hope no lawman is taking the above literally.

My Mom Says No

The folks behind the new What Would Your Mother Do Conversation Underwear hope to dissuade teen girls and guys from doing it. Featuring statements like “Zip it” and “Not tonight” on the panty’s waistband and on undershirts, the creators of the unmentionables (as well as the well-appointed site featuring cute trim teens in tight undies and T’s) claim: “We know you’ll make wise choices (after all, you were raised by wonderful moms!). We just want to provide you with cute reminders to help you make an impression – somewhat discreetly. So, go ahead – make a statement. Because it’s always the right time to be a little more nice, a bit less naughty and a whole lot playful!

Of course what they seem to forget is that if a boy or girl gets to the point where these cute little sayings can be seen, then they have already progressed well past the point where our moms would want things to get to anyway.