THE SEX FILES: Playboy Knows What Your Doing

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I don’t really know how the summer gets away from me, but here it is almost fall and I realize I didn’t even touch on Playboy’s 2011 sex survey. According to the famous magazine’s press: “In 1983, over the course of five issues, Playboy reported the results of the most sweeping sex poll in history.” The magazine collected responses from 8,002 male and 2,001 female visitors to Playboy.com as well as in other ways and while things have changed a bit for us all since the start of the 80’s-MTV is no longer a force in modern music and suit jackets with shoulder pads seem to be out as far as fashion is concerned (and the bottom of my pants don’t come to rest….in my boots!)-as we’d all suspect, lots of Playboy’s numbers point to the influence of internet porn. 78% more people surveyed today report watching adult movies than the 40% in 1983, both men and women masturbate (or are now admitting to it) while having less intercourse, and it seems “reverse cowgirl”—woman on top, facing away—is the most popular current sexual position, one often seen in modern-day porn…or so I have heard.

Sex in public is up 76% from about 35% and 70% of female respondents have admitted to being photographed nude…nearly 50% while having sex (where are these women?). 60% of us have had fantasies of ex lovers (what I’d be interested in knowing is how many of those times we fantasize are when we are with a current lover). 52% of people within an age range of 25-34 have had sex with a coworker. 70% of married people and 76% of single would like to have sex more often. 59% of women are faking orgasms when they do have sex with a partner (although what good is it faking when you masturbate?)

In a not so funny stat, nearly a quarter of men and 13% of women kept their STD diagnosis from their partners! In a stat I found most heartening though, taking the wind out of the sail of what I feel is the modern-day emasculating of supposed male sexual addiction, it seems 41% of the women surveyed have naughty stuff on their computers…maybe it’s not just the guys sitting around, sitting around (if you know what I mean).

What this all means, as with every poll, is that we can look at numbers, consider trends, and damn well agree that in this case the Internet is influencing our lives-or at the very least increasing our facility to watch porn and download images we might use later-but really has man (or woman) really evolved all that much through the years?

We’re just a bunch of horny little monkeys trying to rub our pink parts against one another, or at the very least against out own hands.

Read more about the Playboy survey here.

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